Make Peace with Mistakes
Chances are that at some point in your life, you’ve made a mistake. Some mistakes could have cost you everything, and maybe some already have. It’s normal to feel terrible after a mistake, but what’s important is how we respond to it after. Keep reading for some helpful tips to keep in mind when mistakes happen.
Mistakes are part of being human
Most artificial intelligence (AI) software makes mistakes, which means that its easy for you to make them too. The difference is that you are human, and this is something that naturally happens when humans grow, change, and take risks. This is evidence that you are trying, learning, and moving forward. Missing a deadline, forgetting an appointment, or choosing a path that no longer fits are all common experiences, not personal flaws.
Mistakes give us information
Making a mistake does not instantly mean that you failed. Many times, it shows that you tried something that didn’t work and you need to try again.
Mistakes help clarify what matters
They give us an opportunity to pause, reassess and reflect. Many times, this will help us refine priorities and values. Sometimes we only learn what truly matters after something does not work out.
Mistakes give us the opportunity to correct
There are big mistakes and small mistakes. When you make small mistakes, sometimes you can spot another option for a solution right away and can quickly correct it. Many times, when you correct a small mistake, it helps prevent a bigger mistake from happening. If you make a big mistake, make a note to yourself, and to those affected around you that you are changing your direction based off of something you learned. You can probably teach others something too. It's ok to make mistakes, but it’s advisable not to take large risks or put the livelihood of others at risk. Some mistakes are harder to bounce back from others. Some mistakes can cost you everything. Depending on the risks you take, it’s best to consult an advisor or someone that has already made that mistake in the past.
Starting over does not erase progress
Restarting does not mean you’re moving backwards. Starting over after a mistake means that you are building on your progress and will do better next time. If fact, the sooner you make mistakes, you take one step closer to reaching your goal, or solving a problem.
Image by Elimende Inagella
Every time you make a decision, work towards something, or put yourself out there, you risk making a mistake. As humans we tend to overestimate how many negative outcomes will actually occur. Risk will always be part of life, and while mistakes can be big or small, most of the mistakes we worry about never actually happen. Chances are even greater that if you make a mistake, there is a way to fix it.
Holding onto the past keeps us stuck. Replaying mistakes in our minds keeps us focused on what cannot be changed instead of what can. When we carry the weight of over-criticizing our past mistakes with us, it takes up mental space that could be used for planning what comes next. Continuing to judge yourself for a past decision does not improve the outcome. Adjusting your next step does.
Image by Gabriel Gurrola
Self compassion leads to better results. Being kind to yourself makes change more sustainable. Progress is easier to maintain when it comes from patience instead of pressure. People who allow room for mistakes are more likely to keep going than those who expect perfection.
You are allowed to move on. Growth includes letting go. You are allowed to acknowledge a mistake, learn from it, and leave it in the past. Letting go of guilt makes room for clarity and forward momentum. You are a different person than you were in the past. What matters is who you are trying to be today. You can't turn back the clock, but you can change your future. Repeat this phase often: "If I had known better, I would have done better."
We've talked about why it's important to learn one new thing a day, no matter how small. We've also discussed why it's important to journal for self reflection. It's good to reflect on the past so that we can learn from it and make better choices for the future. Every day is a reset point. You do not need to wait for a new year, a new week, or a perfect moment to begin again. Each day offers a quiet opportunity to start over, no announcements required. You can restart a habit on a Tuesday afternoon just as easily as on January first.
Image by Randy Laybourne
It is frustrating to change direction, especially if it's something you've gotten far too deep in. That's ok. Learning is a process that takes time. Wouldn't it be great if we could magically absorb all of the information we will learn throughout life in one moment so we can benefit from that knowledge sooner? Yes, but life doesn't work that way. Life is about making mistakes, learning from them and doing better next time. Keep track of what you learn, and apply what you learned.
Until next time, stay balanced!